Ok so remember when I said that my next post would be after the appointment? Well I lied...

So here's the run-down:

• Paid all outstanding charges to my doctor? CHECK.
• Called insurance to verify coverage? CHECK (90%/$10K cap)
• Tested a billion times in the hopes I wouldn't need IVF? CHECK. (BFN, obviously)
• Started my new cycle so that I can begin testing? NOPE.

So yeah, I haven't started testing yet. I called my doctor and he put me on Provera. So it will be anywhere from 1 to 3 weeks before I start testing.

I get to go to a class in a couple of weeks about IVF for 3 hours. yay.

P.S. New template... you like?

Better now....

I am feeling better now, with the exception that I got a surprise bill from my Dr. I knew about it but forgot about it... maybe even meant to forget about it because it reminded me of this big life changing thing I am about to do (and have been trying to do for YEARS)... So I will pay it off tomorrow and then wait for some sort of sign from my bod that it's time to make the appointment. The first step in Operation Puppy-Falling-Asleep-Standing-Up.

The next post will be after said appointment...

I'm not O - FU@%$&ING - kay

I had a bit of a freak out yesterday about IVF. I feel like I have been taking thise whole thingwell, but it just got to me. It's 2009. In 2001 I saw my OB/GYN about fertility. That means it's been 8 long years of a whole lot of nothing. Well, not nothing. I DID have tests, pills, injections, monitoring, lying about why I don't have kids, early morning doctor visits, IUI, and more people looking at my hoo-haw than I care to know. Most people know exactly how many ultrasounds the have had. I lost count somewhere in the 20's.

My doctor was always impressed by my positiveness each month when I went in for new tests because the last ones didn't work. Except for the first time, I never cried when I got the negative beta results back.

Now it's come down to test tubing it. And frankly, I'm scared to death.

Quite proud of myself....

Today I changed the bulbs in my car's headlamps... I know it's a small feat, but I betcha I did it faster than Josh would have done...

Next week I get to change my flasher relay for my turn signals... I have been driving without turn signals for, um, a little while now... I didn't realize it was just a part you need to replace in your dash, I thought it was a major $500 deal... so far it has cost me $34.95, but we shall see...Maybe I will even change my own oil*...

*then again, maybe not....

Coolest. Site. EVER.

Passive Aggressive Notes

This is a hilarious site! Go check it out - and check out the links too...

I am up in Seattle right now. I should be home snug as a bug in my own bed, but Mother Nature decided we didn't have enough snow and dumped a bunch literally about 1/2 hour before we were set to leave....

I am getting anxious to call my doctor and get the ball rolling on Operation Puppy Falling Asleep While Standing

On the BRIGHT side.. I got two cool books - Sex and Bacon by Sarah Katherine Lewis and Belle du Jour by, well, anonymous... Both not for the faint of heart... Belle du Jour is basically a classier version of Sex and Bacon, both still graphic as hell, so if you don't want to hear about sex in weird places, with weird things, with weird people, these books aren't for you.

I CAN however recommend some light-hearted comedic books for my TTC freinds... try Notes from the UnderBelly and Tales from the Crib, both by Risa (not Lisa) Green. they were pretty funny... Oh, and I am now FINALLY on Shopaholic Ties the Knot, so far Sophie Kinsella has not let me down...

Yeah, I'm kinda extreme that way....